Tushuuu ❤️ Pushuuu

I took your love for granted. I'm sorry. And I miss you more than I know how to say.

A text couldn't hold everything I need to tell you, so I built this instead. I'm not here to ask you for anything. Just read it, when you're ready.

Tushuuu and Pushuuu
I miss us
scroll down, my love ↓

A Letter For You

read it slowly, I mean every word

My dearest Pushuuu,

I took your love for granted. That is the truth, and I'm done dressing it up in softer words. You loved me openly, in a hundred small ways, every single day, and I received all of it like it was ordinary. Like it would always be there, no matter how little I gave back.

And I know this time was different. This one was bigger, and I'm not going to shrink it or joke it away. You're hurt, and I take that completely seriously. A "sorry" this size has to be earned, not just said.

You never asked for much. You asked to be loved the way you love, to be met halfway, to feel chosen instead of assumed. I didn't reciprocate the way you deserved, and I let you carry the weight of us alone. I carry that with me every hour of the day.

I miss you. I miss you in the middle of the most ordinary things, like reaching for my phone to tell you something small, or hearing something funny and turning to where you should be. The silence where you used to be is the loudest thing I've ever heard.

So here is the truth, as plainly as I can write it: I'm not asking you to forgive me. I'm asking you to watch me change. Not promises shouted in a hard moment, but quiet, daily, boring, real change. You don't have to say a word. You don't have to decide anything. Just watch.

Forever yours,
Tushuuu 💖

I Miss You

in all the small places you used to fill

I miss your voice at the end of a long day, and the way everything heavy got lighter the moment you picked up.

I miss telling you the small, pointless things, because nothing feels fully real until I've told you about it.

I miss your laugh. I miss being the reason for it, instead of the reason it went quiet.

And most of all, I miss every moment I had you right there and didn't hold you close enough. I had so many chances to show you what you mean to me, and I let them pass like they'd never run out.

Missing you is not a mood. It's the weather now.

Things I Need You To Know

press it as many times as you want, every one of them is true

You are the best thing that has ever happened to me. 💗

Watch Me Change

not promises for a hard moment, these have already started

💝I notice everything now: the small things you do, the effort behind them, the love inside them. And I'm learning to return it, not just receive it.
💝I'm learning to love you the way you love: first, loudly, without being asked, and without keeping score.
💝I listen first now, really listen, before I react, defend, or explain.
💝I will never treat a single day of you as ordinary again. Not one call, not one text, not one quiet evening together.
💝I'm giving you all the space and time you need. No pressure, no countdown, no expectations.

I'm Not Asking For Forgiveness

I can't give you back the moments where I should have loved you louder, and I won't rush how you feel about that. You get to take every bit of time you need, and none of this page is meant to pressure you out of it.

I just needed you to know two things while you take that time: I miss you, constantly, in everything, and the change has already started. Not for show. For you. For us. For the person I should have been all along.

You don't owe me an answer. You don't owe me anything.

I'll be right here. However long it takes. 🤍